Despite what you might think from reading this blog, there is an awful lot about my feelings that I keep to myself, which leads me to
#51 of 55 things I have learned in (almost) 55 years – No one really cares about your feelings all that much.
Maybe your parents do. Perhaps your boyfriend/ girlfriend does. That’s about it. Please don’t write long blog posts full of angst – which the wonderful urban dictionary defines as
a transcendent emotion in that it combines the unbearable anguish of life with the hopes of overcoming this seemingly impossible situation
Oh, seriously, shut up. Your biggest problem is that you told your toddler to be quiet while you checked your text messages. Now you are going on a 1,500 page self-flagellation of your emotional distress at being a bad mother.
When my children were young and fighting while I was trying to write the next grant that would pay money to put food on the table, I would tell them,
If you don’t be quiet, I’m going to sell you for scientific experiments. I work at a university. I know just the right people to talk to.
I also told them that I would skin them alive and tack their hides beside the door as a warning to their sisters if they didn’t shut the hell up.
More than one person has told me that my children could have believed me and been psychologically scarred for life. That makes me laugh. I think what my children learned was not to waste their time ruminating about what some person might casually say to them.
As for the never-ending stream of posts from people who are seeking “someone who truly understands me” – as I said in #47, It’s Mr. Right, not Mr. Perfect, maybe you are so focused on how YOU feel and what YOU want and what YOU need that you are missing a very good person with whom you could be very happy. Why does someone have to “completely get you” ? I don’t know what the hell that means, anyway. I’m not sure Mrs. Shakespeare “completely got” William, or that Barbara McClintock had a “soul mate” and I don’t think Mother Teresa spent a lot of time worrying if the lepers truly understood her motivation. Freud was wrong. Your internal life is not that interesting. Move on.