Before the pandemic happened, I was planning on speaking at the SAS Global Forum on things I had learned as a statistical consultant. I wanted to call it “This is a hill I will die on” but one of my students suggested “This is a hill I will not die on” was a better title. However, by the time I had this idea the deadline for changing anything in your paper had already passed so the title was

buffalo in the snow
Spirit Lake Natio

From Santiago to the Spirit Lake Nation: 30 things I learned in 30 years as a statistical consultant

You can click the link above and read it.

My point is that I am a serious person doing serious things – some of the time and tomorrow I will write about statistics. However … since there is a blogging challenge going on

Today, Eva and I decided to write about quarantine clothes

I am hardly the fashion plate at the best of times. In my bio for The Family Textbook, which is hilarifying and you can purchase for the measly sum of $2.99 it mentions my proclivity for collecting weird socks, which is true. It also notes that I have never sent a dick pic. Also true.

Family textbook biographies

The first rule of web meetings is to wear clothes

The Invisible Developer, also the Chief Technology Officer of 7 Generation Games, contrary to popular belief, is very seldom bossed around by me. However, here is where I draw the line. When he proposed that he could be on time for a daily morning meeting – incidentally, at 11 am – if he attended in his bathrobe, I declared the meeting could start late and he would be clothed. We do, after all, have a sexual harassment policy around here and I am pretty sure showing up in video calls in your bathrobe under which you may or may not be wearing underwear violates it.

Rule #1 Does Not Apply if Your Camera is Turned Off

Gonzalo, a senior software developer, almost never appears with the web camera turned on and when he does, he was wearing a mask before it was cool. No, not like an N95 mask but like a “I’m-a-member-of-the-horde-from-World-of-Warcraft” mask.

If you think I am kidding, check out this video on designing video games which includes Gonzalo and his very cool mask.

When I mentioned the clothing required rule he said,

Wait, what? You can’t attend the meeting in your pajamas?

I told him that rule only applied if your camera was turned on, and then he calmed down considerably.

Rule #2: Only what can be seen on camera matters

Which is why, today, it was perfectly appropriate for me to attend three meetings wearing a plain, long-sleeved blue shirt, a hoodie, long underwear pants and sock monkey slippers.

Rule #3 All quarantine outfits can be improved by well-chosen socks

I have socks with flamingos, sushi, my granddaughter’s face, multi-colored chihuahuas and World War II female welders.

Variety in foot attire is an important part of the optimal quarantine outfit

Rule #4: Some meetings are so stupid, they require special socks

Yes, I have socks that say, “This meeting is bullshit”. I am prepared

I try to avoid useless meetings that should have been an email but sometimes these are unavoidable. In this case, it is extremely important to have the correct socks because you can look down and appear to be studiously considering whatever dumb ass suggestion the other person has just made.

Rule #5 For people who say you need to dress professionally for web meetings, see rule #4

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